Too late to start?

[Tidus56]

go hunting. You only live once, and if you want to experience hunting then you should! you have already brought it up and heard her thoughts. Now you go and tell her you have decided to go hunt this fall because it is something you need to do for you! However, you would like to reassure her that this will in no way change the kind of kind-hearted man that you are, and furthermore you will be sure to not make any messes in the house, or require her to eat your harvest. You can enjoy the meat yourself or bless friends and family with it, or those in need! Let her know that you take this very seriously and will be practicing your shooting and hunting skills beforehand in order to have a SAFE and fun experience. You plan to wear Hunter orange etc. and will be safe. Your wife loves and cares for you and she needs to know you appreciate that, but she also needs to let you be your own man and experience things in this life! Your fishing buddies are gone and a long time friend has reached out to you and you wanna take advantage of this opportunity to further your friendship with them as well as enjoy the great outdoors. Sunrise from a frosty treestand is quite beautiful! Man I feel like an advice columnist lol! Good luck and happy hunting!

That right there is a well written, well thought out response. Thats sage advice IMO

 

[rammac]

I'll be 64 this hunting season and I've got disabilities for a lower back issue and a partially removed meniscus in my right knee, not to mention blood pressure issues, arthritis and gut problems, but I still hunt deer, elk, grouse, etc. I can't keep up with the pace of a younger hunter but I can still get out there and enjoy hunting.

I divorced the first wife within a few years because she wanted to be the center of our world, I've been with the second wife over 25 years. I guess we all make mistakes but I'm pretty surprised that at 60 years old this hasn't already been dealt with in your relationship.

 

[AlphaDogs]

My neighbor has similar issues. I bought him a new couch. (chuckle)

 

[SteelBanger]

If it's something you want to do and experience then you need to do it, no question about it. Yes these things should be discussed in any relationship, especially when it involves spending a fair amount of family resources (both time and money) but if it's something that fits within the constraints of your lives then there's zero practical or logical reason for her to be opposed to it. I consider myself more tolerant, understanding, and patient than most but one thing I could never handle is a wife that tries to control me and my interests / hobbies ... and I certainly don't try to control hers.

I'm pretty lucky, I got into shooting right when I got engaged and have spent a fair amount of money on guns over the years, a couple purchases causing a little bit of a ruckus. I also got into hunting about 4 years into our marriage and she fully supported that and the money that went into it. Yes she's not always a fan when I want to head out into the woods and leave her with the kids all day, but she gets that it's something important to me and that it grounds me and helps me unwind ... which makes us all happier in the end! lol

And always remember, it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission!

 

[JMW67]

I have been married for 35+ yrs. I have never hunted anything but fish & only then a few times a year with 3 fishing buddies. Now my fishing buddies have either retired & moved away or have plain retired. I am the last one working & a co-worker whom i have known & worked with for 25 yrs has invited me Deer Hunting for several years now. I want to go, the deadline for getting tags is in 2 days. This fall i will be 60 yr old. I did not bring it up to my wife before because i know how she feels about hunters......because her dad & uncles hunted & she grew up & did not appreciate their demeanor. Last night i told her i wanted to go this fall, She gave every reason under the sun ranging from , "This is not you" to , "i don't want the mess in the house, i will not eat deer meat, Your 60 yrs old, you have a bad back, you could get shot. You are not going to do this. You did not grow up this way"...…..My question is , How do i get thru to her? I do not want to be insensitive but is hunting worth pursuing at my age? I feel i would regret it if i didn't at least try. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.

Its never to late to try things you want to do maybe for your first year just go with a camera take pictures and enjoy the fellowship with other hunters and ease her into this thing you want to do you will most likely have pictures of the deer the other hunters are looking for. My first wife did not hunt she also thought she would not eat wild game till I finally told she had been for a couple years my second wife loves it and has turned into one of the best hunters I have ever known she can wear out a camera in a hunting season and has always gotten the animal she was looking for she has hunted south texas,west texas, new mexico, old mexico Colorado and Africa hunting brought us closer than we ever would have been with out it

 

[Dosh]

James, I'll be 71 by this fall's hunting season. Can't wait! My wife passed three years ago and she went on a couple elk hunts. My lady friend now was born on a ranch and enjoys eating wild game. We both apply for tags and she is a great shot. Going on a November deer hunt and December elk hunt together. You definitely need to go hunting, the experience is unforgettable. Calmly explain, but don't ask permission. Get the tag! Enjoy the experience! Good luck

 

[motrapper]

Bingo!!!
What Dosh said
Calmly explain, but don't ask permission. Get the tag! Enjoy the experience! Good luck

 

[BigDon]

Do it and respect her boundaries. If you don't you will always carry that 'What if' regret.

 

[James K.]

go hunting. You only live once, and if you want to experience hunting then you should! you have already brought it up and heard her thoughts. Now you go and tell her you have decided to go hunt this fall because it is something you need to do for you! However, you would like to reassure her that this will in no way change the kind of kind-hearted man that you are, and furthermore you will be sure to not make any messes in the house, or require her to eat your harvest. You can enjoy the meat yourself or bless friends and family with it, or those in need! Let her know that you take this very seriously and will be practicing your shooting and hunting skills beforehand in order to have a SAFE and fun experience. You plan to wear Hunter orange etc. and will be safe. Your wife loves and cares for you and she needs to know you appreciate that, but she also needs to let you be your own man and experience things in this life! Your fishing buddies are gone and a long time friend has reached out to you and you wanna take advantage of this opportunity to further your friendship with them as well as enjoy the great outdoors. Sunrise from a frosty treestand is quite beautiful! Man I feel like an advice columnist lol! Good luck and happy hunting!

SPOT ON DUDE!!!...…..thank you

 

[remingtonman]

I have been married for 35+ yrs. I have never hunted anything but fish & only then a few times a year with 3 fishing buddies. Now my fishing buddies have either retired & moved away or have plain retired. I am the last one working & a co-worker whom i have known & worked with for 25 yrs has invited me Deer Hunting for several years now. I want to go, the deadline for getting tags is in 2 days. This fall i will be 60 yr old. I did not bring it up to my wife before because i know how she feels about hunters......because her dad & uncles hunted & she grew up & did not appreciate their demeanor. Last night i told her i wanted to go this fall, She gave every reason under the sun ranging from , "This is not you" to , "i don't want the mess in the house, i will not eat deer meat, Your 60 yrs old, you have a bad back, you could get shot. You are not going to do this. You did not grow up this way"...…..My question is , How do i get thru to her? I do not want to be insensitive but is hunting worth pursuing at my age? I feel i would regret it if i didn't at least try. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.

marriage is give & take. You should enjoy your marriage while at the same time grow closer together although in some cases not possible. Do something she likes then offer to take her deer hunting. I guarantee you it's not gona be like what she though it was when she was growing up. She needs to get over it and try it. When you hunt you are not always killing but hunting most of the time. The kill is always the bonus of the hunt. I would say to you GO HUNTING! If she doesnt like it now hopefully she will in the future. I view hunting as a nature walk with a gun.

 

[bgbuck153]

Why do woman feel like hunting is the end all.Some people just don't get the solitude the freedom the healing powers the peace. I'm not much of a church goer but I supported her in going along with my daughters and I'd even go. I'd go to her school concerts that she put together and support her. I'd go see stupid girly movies or stupid musicals to support her. Does she really think I wanted to heck no.... I'd rather kill myself with a spoon. She's now my EX WIFE. My motto now is "if you don't get it then get out". I don't drink, do drugs or smoke. If you don't want to be a trained dog then man up.

 

[VLD Pilot]

I'd hate to be in your shoes. I've been with my wife for 22 years and don't plan on changing that BUT if my wife said "Your not going to do that" I'd have to let her know my mother died years ago and don't need a replacement. I don't know you or your wife or your 35 year relationship. Maybe that's normal for her to say and expect so it's odd for me to understand it. Not going to judge your situation so I'll say it's something that needs to be worked out. Also how much give and take there is in your marriage. My wife can be stubborn( for the lack of using a different word)but in the end, she knows right from wrong. If i were suddenly going out alone at night and returning late, thats a different story. Hunting with buddies you've known for 25 years is just something you'll do once retired with more time on your hands. No different than your wife saying "Hey dear, my girlfriend wants to take me golfing, I think I'm gonna try it out". Well golfers are snobs so you aren't going golfing. Doesn't really sound fair, does it. Sounds like you have your hands full with this situation. Good luck. John.

 

[25WSM]

To me the hunt is a spiritual thing. You get alone time in nature and be in the world God created. Just isn't anything more calming and peaceful than sitting out in the woods with nature doing its thing all around you. Shooting an animal is a very small part of hunting. It's a very rewarding part but just a small moment of the whole hunt. The best memories I have are from deer camp and the military. These guys are your brothers and you know it. Sisters too if you have women there. We never did. There is nothing like breakfast at camp. The warmth of the wood stove when you come in cold and wet. Everybody talking about what they saw. You need to go at least once and no you don't need to take a gun unless you want to. If you don't want the meat go to any church and it will be gone in a second. But at least keep one backstrap and enjoy one of the finer foods in life.
Shep

 

[Bang4theBuck]

My response will probably sound a little 'softer' than some of the others, but here it goes......I would gather and share with your wife, a few accounts from guys, gals, or children who went hunting for the first time. What you will find in 90+% of those stories are irreplaceable memories. There is not a person that I know that has been big game hunting and been successful in harvesting that can't recall every last detail of their first hunt (and most after that). Every wife is different but here are some other strategies:
1. Discuss with her the need that most states have to 'manage the herds', and how taking more deer usually equates to a healthier herd, when properly managed. You just want to do your part!
2. Decide ahead of time and commit to donating your deer meat to a needy family. There are tons of 'hunters for hunger' sites that will accept your game, free of charge, and feed someone who needs it......especially now!
3. There is a shortage of beef on the horizon due to processors having to shut down over Covid 19 ...nuff said.
4. Offer to take a son, daughter, nephew, niece, grandson, or other first time hunter with you and learn together, starting with Hunter's safety. This will just enhance your memories.
5. Remind here that deer camp is seldom most about the kill, but rather the comradery. Deer camp is just a venue to bond with your buds....success is the icing on the cake.
6. If all that doesn't work, tell here that after 34 years of a great marriage, you though it might be nice to go on a week long vacation without her, and you might realized that she feels the same way (be careful with this one). Be prepared to set her up with a weekend with a friend/daughter/granddaughter during the same time frame that you are in the woods for them to do whatever they want. 3 day trip to Vegas, Weekend at the spa, tickets to the price is right, or a wine tasting tour....whatever.
7. A bad back along with most other similar conditions should not be a barrier to hunting. There is always a plan that can be developed to take the grunt work out of the hunt, whether it's with someone younger, or paying for services.

You really started it now......you are going to have to tell us how it goes from here.....provided your skin is thick enough to hear all the feedback.