Too late to start?

[Bro Dave]

Never too late, just not soon enough.

 

[Muddyboots]

James B:
1st - a lot of really nice thoughts have been conveyed to you and I hope you cherry pick those out!
2nd - Hunters for the Hungry program is needed now more than ever so if you are successful you will be helping a family sustain their lives in a wonderful way.
3rd - I will be married 40 years shortly and we have had some interesting "discussions" in which no one "wins" but I would hope you have the same relationship in which we both acknowledge sometimes there are no winners and you just move on. That's how you have been married for 35 and others longer.
4th - We all have had life regrets and I hope you realize this may be one that you cannot let get away from you. Memories from hunting whether in photo or in memory will be with you the rest of your life and I bet will bring a smile when you relive them, we all do.
5th - although my wife does not eat venison, she realizes I do and doesn't prevent me from doing so since I have explained the eating of the meat obtained from hunting is one of the basic rewards from doing so.
6th - have some venison made up into high quality sausage, sticks, jerky that maybe she would try or you can share with your family and friends. I have many friends that are not hunters, will never do so BUT look forward to the venison treats that I provide knowing full well it is from a deer. It helps them understand why I do what I do and hopefully bridges some emotion about hunting when it is seen the animal is thoughtfully used.

Don't let physical limitations hold you back. Nobody knows what the next day will bring and sometimes you just have to grab the brass ring since you just don't know how many times you can do so.

I've got Muddyboots trumped by about 9 years and I concur with his sentiments exactly. Get yourself a good rifle, a good pair of boots and head out into the wonderful world of the "woods." Hopefully you'll be successful and you can bring your animal home. Then turn to your wife and say, after handing her you're hunting knife, "skin it." ( I am assuming you can still run)

John,
I will let you win this one for sure!!!! Gives me hope I will be hunting in 9 years as well!

 

[Stgraves260]

I have been married for 35+ yrs. I have never hunted anything but fish & only then a few times a year with 3 fishing buddies. Now my fishing buddies have either retired & moved away or have plain retired. I am the last one working & a co-worker whom i have known & worked with for 25 yrs has invited me Deer Hunting for several years now. I want to go, the deadline for getting tags is in 2 days. This fall i will be 60 yr old. I did not bring it up to my wife before because i know how she feels about hunters......because her dad & uncles hunted & she grew up & did not appreciate their demeanor. Last night i told her i wanted to go this fall, She gave every reason under the sun ranging from , "This is not you" to , "i don't want the mess in the house, i will not eat deer meat, Your 60 yrs old, you have a bad back, you could get shot. You are not going to do this. You did not grow up this way"...…..My question is , How do i get thru to her? I do not want to be insensitive but is hunting worth pursuing at my age? I feel i would regret it if i didn't at least try. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.

Just tell her you want try try something new. Tell her you both have all ways supported each other now matter what. ( if you haven't, then your marriage wouldn't have lasted 35 years ) tell her it's on your bucket list. Tell her you have always supported her weather you believed in it or not because you love her. Tell her you have all ways wanted to go hunting but out of respect for her you never did cause you knew how she felt about it. Tell her you want to at least experience it for yourself. If she really loves you like I know she does cause 35 years is a long time. Then she will respect your wishes as you have hers by not hunting for the past 35 years. Something like that anyway. Good luck.

 

[ted7]

As Nike opines JUST DO IT! Hunting whether you harvest a deer or not is an experience and memory that no one but God can take from you. Start building your own hunting memories. I am 76 and took 3 nice bull elk in the last 5 years. If a decrepit old fart like me can do it so can you. Your next post should be something like hey guys any rifle and cartridge you could recommend for a rank newbie?

 

[Pro2A]

I have been married for 35+ yrs. I have never hunted anything but fish & only then a few times a year with 3 fishing buddies. Now my fishing buddies have either retired & moved away or have plain retired. I am the last one working & a co-worker whom i have known & worked with for 25 yrs has invited me Deer Hunting for several years now. I want to go, the deadline for getting tags is in 2 days. This fall i will be 60 yr old. I did not bring it up to my wife before because i know how she feels about hunters......because her dad & uncles hunted & she grew up & did not appreciate their demeanor. Last night i told her i wanted to go this fall, She gave every reason under the sun ranging from , "This is not you" to , "i don't want the mess in the house, i will not eat deer meat, Your 60 yrs old, you have a bad back, you could get shot. You are not going to do this. You did not grow up this way"...…..My question is , How do i get thru to her? I do not want to be insensitive but is hunting worth pursuing at my age? I feel i would regret it if i didn't at least try. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.

Your wife brought up some interesting points you should consider with her. Her "You are not going to do this" would be really, really concerning to me. Is she supporting your happiness, or her happiness, or YOUR together happiness? Both of your "happys" should not be mutually exclusive. But, then, you are much more likely to be shot on the streets of your town than in the woods. . You are not hunting in your house....the "mess" won't be there. You aren't asking her to eat deer. Maybe your bad back is because you haven't gotten enough activity out in nature....or she's spent 35+ years stomping on it. You are not her dad or uncles...you are the man she fell in love with and built a, hopefully worthwhile, life with. (Does she have male role issues???) You may have not "grown up this way", but it's never to late to have a happy childhood. (I'm aggressively still perfecting mine at 71.) And, the next fall you will be 61, then, 62, and sooner than you can blink an eye....your years will be finished.....money is a renewable resource....heartbeats are finite. You've got a lot of years to make up for. Life is short; we are temporary tourists passing through this world. Hunting is definitely worth pursuing at any age, and so much more precious with age. It's not about merely harvesting an animal. It's about fair chase and respecting the wildlife God has bestowed upon this land. for our enjoyment......admiration and consumption. Does she eat meat? (I may not want that answer.) There's no fair chase there. They call them slaughter houses for a reason. It's about being with friends, sharing, and building strong bonds; making lasting experiences........kinda like a marriage relationship. It's about being out in this beautiful world which God gave us to enjoy and being stewards; it's about self discipline and testing one's self; learning new skills and improving competencies and confidence, and about mentoring others. It's about developing new traditions and preserving old ones; and, even, about testing one's self against God's creatures and the elements. and, very importantly, it's about making the choices you want to, and doing what you chose to do with your heartbeats. And, probably most importantly, it's about a mate being supportive and wanting the other mate to be happy. There may be more crucial questions that need to be explored therein beyond merely hunting. I have the name of a good Family Law attorney, should all reason fail. Hope to see you at the Conservation Commission deer check station. Best wishes; safe, happy hunting.....good luck with that marriage.

 

[sceeder]

I have been married for 35+ yrs. I have never hunted anything but fish & only then a few times a year with 3 fishing buddies. Now my fishing buddies have either retired & moved away or have plain retired. I am the last one working & a co-worker whom i have known & worked with for 25 yrs has invited me Deer Hunting for several years now. I want to go, the deadline for getting tags is in 2 days. This fall i will be 60 yr old. I did not bring it up to my wife before because i know how she feels about hunters......because her dad & uncles hunted & she grew up & did not appreciate their demeanor. Last night i told her i wanted to go this fall, She gave every reason under the sun ranging from , "This is not you" to , "i don't want the mess in the house, i will not eat deer meat, Your 60 yrs old, you have a bad back, you could get shot. You are not going to do this. You did not grow up this way"...…..My question is , How do i get thru to her? I do not want to be insensitive but is hunting worth pursuing at my age? I feel i would regret it if i didn't at least try. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.

I just tell my wife I'm older than her and old enough to make decisions for myself. My wife won't eat deer meat either but hey that leaves more for me. Tell her you're going deer hunting and you love her.

 

[Tiny Tim]

Your wife loves you (as evidenced by 35 years of marriage). You obviously know her and more than we do about her dislike of hunting and hunters. She is likely not rationalizing the situation but feeling it or relieving something from the past. She obviously knows your character and approves of it. Use that to your advantage and try to get her to experience your heart and desires. Assure here that some hunting is not going to change the man you are for the worse, but likely for the better. If not, you ought to take a hard look at yourself. And that change is something to talk about and consider in the future. Men and women need healthy same sex relationships, they just usually fail to recognize each other's needs in this area because they look much different.

If her concern is truly concern, you can have a discussion about how your safety is of paramount importance and how you will minimize hazards. If it is out of fear, then it is out of selfishness, putting her fears above your desires.
Since time is of the essence, I'd buy the tags and work on the issue. GOOD marriage counseling is never bad. We all have junk and I applaud your long term marriage. It's rare these days. Much of the advice you've received is wonderful, and some is from divorced men or those close to it. Their not the ones you should listen to unless you desire to be like them.
I am blessed with a wonderful wife who doesn't care to hunt but is supportive and enjoys the benefits of a harvest. I need to get away at times and this time is well spent, alone or with a buddy. She sees the change in me as my spirit is refreshed. I openly admit I come home empty handed far more than with game, but its about much more than that.
You have a perception to deal with, whether it's the hunting or the food. You seem to be a caring and successful husband. Assure her of your love and commitment to her and I pray you come to an agreement that allows you to go and both reap the benefits of it.

 

[Pro2A]

If it's something you want to do and experience then you need to do it, no question about it. Yes these things should be discussed in any relationship, especially when it involves spending a fair amount of family resources (both time and money) but if it's something that fits within the constraints of your lives then there's zero practical or logical reason for her to be opposed to it. I consider myself more tolerant, understanding, and patient than most but one thing I could never handle is a wife that tries to control me and my interests / hobbies ... and I certainly don't try to control hers.

I'm pretty lucky, I got into shooting right when I got engaged and have spent a fair amount of money on guns over the years, a couple purchases causing a little bit of a ruckus. I also got into hunting about 4 years into our marriage and she fully supported that and the money that went into it. Yes she's not always a fan when I want to head out into the woods and leave her with the kids all day, but she gets that it's something important to me and that it grounds me and helps me unwind ... which makes us all happier in the end! lol

And always remember, it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission!

"And always remember, it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission! " But, not necessarily cheaper.

 

[BASE424]

I have been married for 35+ yrs. I have never hunted anything but fish & only then a few times a year with 3 fishing buddies. Now my fishing buddies have either retired & moved away or have plain retired. I am the last one working & a co-worker whom i have known & worked with for 25 yrs has invited me Deer Hunting for several years now. I want to go, the deadline for getting tags is in 2 days. This fall i will be 60 yr old. I did not bring it up to my wife before because i know how she feels about hunters......because her dad & uncles hunted & she grew up & did not appreciate their demeanor. Last night i told her i wanted to go this fall, She gave every reason under the sun ranging from , "This is not you" to , "i don't want the mess in the house, i will not eat deer meat, Your 60 yrs old, you have a bad back, you could get shot. You are not going to do this. You did not grow up this way"...…..My question is , How do i get thru to her? I do not want to be insensitive but is hunting worth pursuing at my age? I feel i would regret it if i didn't at least try. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.

Well James, what do you think? We all gave you our opinions and I for one am really looking forward to the knowledge that you are going hunting. I will do you one better and invite you to Pagosa Springs, Colorado for an elk hunt. I will take you to our area we hunt, you carry your gun and ammunition and I will carry the rest. My buddy will more than likely pack out your elk with his pack horses depending how far in we are. I don't think you're going to get a better offer than this. Open offer to get you out there...

 

[nz 101]

I have been married for 35+ yrs. I have never hunted anything but fish & only then a few times a year with 3 fishing buddies. Now my fishing buddies have either retired & moved away or have plain retired. I am the last one working & a co-worker whom i have known & worked with for 25 yrs has invited me Deer Hunting for several years now. I want to go, the deadline for getting tags is in 2 days. This fall i will be 60 yr old. I did not bring it up to my wife before because i know how she feels about hunters......because her dad & uncles hunted & she grew up & did not appreciate their demeanor. Last night i told her i wanted to go this fall, She gave every reason under the sun ranging from , "This is not you" to , "i don't want the mess in the house, i will not eat deer meat, Your 60 yrs old, you have a bad back, you could get shot. You are not going to do this. You did not grow up this way"...…..My question is , How do i get thru to her? I do not want to be insensitive but is hunting worth pursuing at my age? I feel i would regret it if i didn't at least try. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated.

just tell her you're going and deal with the rest when you get home simple

 

[Orange Dust]

Well James, what do you think? We all gave you our opinions and I for one am really looking forward to the knowledge that you are going hunting. I will do you one better and invite you to Pagosa Springs, Colorado for an elk hunt. I will take you to our area we hunt, you carry your gun and ammunition and I will carry the rest. My buddy will more than likely pack out your elk with his pack horses depending how far in we are. I don't think you're going to get a better offer than this. Open offer to get you out there...

Offers don't come better than that!

 

[26Reload]

Well James, what do you think? We all gave you our opinions and I for one am really looking forward to the knowledge that you are going hunting. I will do you one better and invite you to Pagosa Springs, Colorado for an elk hunt. I will take you to our area we hunt, you carry your gun and ammunition and I will carry the rest. My buddy will more than likely pack out your elk with his pack horses depending how far in we are. I don't think you're going to get a better offer than this. Open offer to get you out there...

Base242.....this is a little unfair...maybe James wife knows,him better than any of us should......and he does need to stay at home.......
But i am sure I can clear my schedule to hunt elk with you....
.....

 

[Possum Cop]

James I am 69 soon to be 70 and started deer hunting about 7 years ago here in Louisiana. Nothing like being out there sitting in the stand with all that peace and quite. I really like to sit and watch for what comes along. We have a very liberal season here with a 6 deer limit. I am happy with one that is all my wife and I need per year so I am very selective of what I shoot. But I shoot every hog and coyote I see and a bobcat if one comes along. You have to be comfortable or you will not sit long. I have spent as much as 8 hours in my stand but not often. Try it you will like it good luck. Forgot married 50 years this July.

I to live in Louisiana. I feed a family of 5 and do no buy beef at all because of all of the steroids and growth hormones that the big beef places use. I sustain my family on venison, small game, and waterfowl. I've been hunting as a way of life since I was big enough to hold a gun. I could not imagine a life without hunting, that would be like not being able to breathe.

 

[Pro2A]

Life is short. Do what you want. Go have fun in the woods with some friends. Nobody ever laid on their death bed and said "wow, I really wish I hadn't experienced so much!"

I believe the quote is:
"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving in a pristine, well preserved body. But, rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worm out, bent, broken, trashed, and loudly proclaiming......WOW....WHAT A RIDE.!!!!"