Need guidance from Law Enforcement

[Carlos88]

I like what you're saying about the dog.

im a pastor, and having done quite a few funerals now there's something an older minister said that has stuck with me regarding a) how we'll be remembered in death and b) what we can tell about a person in life. He said "you can judge a man's character pretty accurately on how he treats old people and kids". I'd add animals to that list too.

He's right as are you.

 

[otisdog]

I spent over 40 years in LE doing pretty much everything including swat with the supposed bad boys. Being mean and abusive is not part of the job and is not acceptable. Please don't judge all of us by a bad actor. If it has not been too long for a prosecution she needs to go after this guy. If that option not there then maybe a complaint to IA. He needs to be out of LE. No agency I know of will retain a guy with a domestic violence conviction.

 

[codyadams]

I spent over 40 years in LE doing pretty much everything including swat with the supposed bad boys. Being mean and abusive is not part of the job and is not acceptable. Please don't judge all of us by a bad actor. If it has not been too long for a prosecution she needs to go after this guy. If that option not there then maybe a complaint to IA. He needs to be out of LE. No agency I know of will retain a guy with a domestic violence conviction.

They can't, as it is a firearms disqualifier. Unless they want to take that chance and put the guy on desk duty....

And I agree. There is no room for "bad apples" in this line of work.

 

[Orange Dust]

I spent over 40 years in LE doing pretty much everything including swat with the supposed bad boys. Being mean and abusive is not part of the job and is not acceptable. Please don't judge all of us by a bad actor. If it has not been too long for a prosecution she needs to go after this guy. If that option not there then maybe a complaint to IA. He needs to be out of LE. No agency I know of will retain a guy with a domestic violence conviction.

I try and judge no one. That's God's job. I just want to do my part to keep him from turning. I have to protect my daughter.

 

[otisdog]

They can't, as it is a firearms disqualifier. Unless they want to take that chance and put the guy on desk duty....

And I agree. There is no room for "bad apples" in this line of work.

Yeah it does prevent firearm possession if convicted As im sure you know it's really hard for the victim these cases to follow thru with prosecution I don't mean to be preaching I just have no tolerance for men that abuse their partners

 

[74honker]

I try and judge no one. That's God's job. I just want to do my part to keep him from turning. I have to protect my daughter.

That's all any father can do. Funny our daughters are pretty close in age, mine 26 right now lol. As you know, and I'm not trying to judge either but at his age of 21 there will be a maturity difference but....not all are immature at that age.

 

[Deleted member 48126]

Bro...not to sound like a hard ***, but I've been through a lot of terrible things. I've never once taken it out on my wife. She upsets me at times, like every wife, but I don't even raise my voice at her. I respect her and love her too much to do that. I'll go to the gym, or chug a beer and hang out on my reloading/gun bench to cool down and she'll never know the difference. You're her father you need to vet the trash to make sure that the guys she brings home love her more than you do. If this new dude is a douche, fix it quick. Doesn't matter if the guy is POTUS. There's no excuse to treat anyone poorly. Especially if it's someone you're supposed to love and support. Next time something like that happens, open up a can or whoop *** on the clown. Domestic abuse is no joke and needs to be dealt with quickly and swiftly.

Rant over....

 

[Orange Dust]

Bro...not to sound like a hard ***, but I've been through a lot of terrible things. I've never once taken it out on my wife. She upsets me at times, like every wife, but I don't even raise my voice at her. I respect her and love her too much to do that. I'll go to the gym, or chug a beer and hang out on my reloading/gun bench to cool down and she'll never know the difference. You're her father you need to vet the trash to make sure that the guys she brings home love her more than you do. If this new dude is a douche, fix it quick. Doesn't matter if the guy is POTUS. There's no excuse to treat anyone poorly. Especially if it's someone you're supposed to love and support. Next time something like that happens, open up a can or whoop *** on the clown. Domestic abuse is no joke and needs to be dealt with quickly and swiftly.

Rant over....

You sound like me. that's why she didn't tell me at the time. Looks like things might be cooling off with the new one. She didn't bring him over to meet us. She says he is self centered and immature. May be starting to run its course. Waiting game for us... She is still seeing him anyway. Maybe someday I will be able to teach her how to put a rock back after turning it over.

 

[Bullmark]

My advice is to be a loving and supportive Father (which it sounds like you are), and pray that your Daughter has enough self worth to avoid those types of men. Ideally you could show her and she'd just get it......but some seem to seek out toxic relationships. If she is cooling off with the current guy b/c he's self-centered, she could be on the right path, and really learned from the past.
I have two teenage boys so no father/daughter experience to draw from but I try to imagine how protective I'd feel over a daughter. I commend you for not giving the Ex a lead enema..
I'll share a quick story. I have a friend, ex pro football player (back when they played for the love of the game and love of hitting), tough as nails and never minced words. He has 3 daughters, a set of twins and another, all are drop dead gorgeous in their late 20s/early 30s now. He had a routine that he perfected whenever one of his girls brought over a date. He had a mason jar with two large "Rocky Mountain Oysters" floating in water, and would place it on the middle of the kitchen island. The new young man never failed to ask what it was in the jar. My friend would respond that the jar contained his trophies from the last guy that tried to do anything to his daughter that she didn't agree with. And he would deliver the message in a way that left no doubt.
I swear to you that's a true story. Good luck buddy....it sounds like you're already doing the right things.

 

[Orange Dust]

My advice is to be a loving and supportive Father (which it sounds like you are), and pray that your Daughter has enough self worth to avoid those types of men. Ideally you could show her and she'd just get it......but some seem to seek out toxic relationships. If she is cooling off with the current guy b/c he's self-centered, she could be on the right path, and really learned from the past.
I have two teenage boys so no father/daughter experience to draw from but I try to imagine how protective I'd feel over a daughter. I commend you for not giving the Ex a lead enema..
I'll share a quick story. I have a friend, ex pro football player (back when they played for the love of the game and love of hitting), tough as nails and never minced words. He has 3 daughters, a set of twins and another, all are drop dead gorgeous in their late 20s/early 30s now. He had a routine that he perfected whenever one of his girls brought over a date. He had a mason jar with two large "Rocky Mountain Oysters" floating in water, and would place it on the middle of the kitchen island. The new young man never failed to ask what it was in the jar. My friend would respond that the jar contained his trophies from the last guy that tried to do anything to his daughter that she didn't agree with. And he would deliver the message in a way that left no doubt.
I swear to you that's a true story. Good luck buddy....it sounds like you're already doing the right things.

The first place I ever take one of the kids new boyfriend is dinner. The second is always the Gun Club. Leaves a lasting impression every time.