Top tip: if you're camping in the summer and the attractive girl in the next tent tells you that because it's so hot she will be sleeping with her flaps open, it's not necessarily an invitation to casual sex. Wish me luck.....I appear in court next Monday.
A fat girl served me food in McDonald's at lunch time. She said, 'sorry about the wait.' I said, 'don't worry, you're bound to lose it eventually.'
I was behind a rather large woman at the checkout. She had on a pair of jeans that said, 'Guess.' I said, "I don't know........maybe 350 pounds."
Snow in the forecast! The TV weather gal said she was expecting 8 inches tonight, I thought to myself "fat chance with a face like that!"
Years ago it was suggested 'that an apple a day kept the doctor away.' But since many doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon sandwich works best.
Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess, "Will you marry me?
The Princess said, "NO!"
And the Prince lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and banged skinny long-legged big-titted broads and hunted and fished and raced cars and went to naked bars and dated women half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Captain Morgan and never heard *****ing and never paid child support or alimony and banged cheerleaders and kept his house and guns and ate spam and potato chips and beans and blew enormous farts and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up.
The End
Dean
A fat girl served me food in McDonald's at lunch time. She said, 'sorry about the wait.' I said, 'don't worry, you're bound to lose it eventually.'
I was behind a rather large woman at the checkout. She had on a pair of jeans that said, 'Guess.' I said, "I don't know........maybe 350 pounds."
Snow in the forecast! The TV weather gal said she was expecting 8 inches tonight, I thought to myself "fat chance with a face like that!"
Years ago it was suggested 'that an apple a day kept the doctor away.' But since many doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon sandwich works best.
Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess, "Will you marry me?
The Princess said, "NO!"
And the Prince lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and banged skinny long-legged big-titted broads and hunted and fished and raced cars and went to naked bars and dated women half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Captain Morgan and never heard *****ing and never paid child support or alimony and banged cheerleaders and kept his house and guns and ate spam and potato chips and beans and blew enormous farts and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up.
The End
Dean
